yay! its the month of May! my favorite month.. i have been very very busy.. photo shoots, work, training, editing, shoot some more, all that.. i need some rest, really.. i feel my recent deviations are not that good and it might be because of the fatigue (im making excuses again.. tsktsk..)

speaking of deviations, here are my new "inspirations" here in DA.. i got to say wow when i saw their gallery, and i wish i have at least a bit of their artistic talent.. ahahaha..

*Sarachmet
dreamy pictures, i love how her pics looks so unnatural, and you might think that it wasnt a photograph..


~Amuletz
OMG, the "odes" are truly breathtaking! the rest of the gallery is just as amazing!


~gnce
she is beautiful, plus she takes awesome photographs, wow..


=andriazmo
another Indonesian photog, much like my other favorite Indonesian photographers, he is exceptional..
:

`larafairie
yeah, she has been around and i already have faved some of her works before, but it was just now that i realized that she is really an amazing artist..


woo.. they are so great! check their gallery for more!!
of course there are no love lost for all my DA idols.. *slumberdoll, `zemotion, =rozette, *endintears, *hellolikegoodbye, *Umbresh, *afvoetomath, *LittleJean and many many many more.. i am really greatful to be able to grace their art..

hmmm.. so what i have been upto? ive been in HK.. yay! you can check my photos there in
Day2
Cinderella's Castle
Day3
Day4
(day one is still missing, T_T)
HK SHOTS


SHUTTER + SCARY
shutter is scary! really, though its not realistic, plus it has a lot of inconsistencies, oh well, it was created to scare not to be true to life! :'D let me feature some of my favorite scary deviations here in DA..


i also had a recent shoot with my nephew Samboy and his friends in UP.. i would be uploading more soon.. haha, my 2nd individual shoot..

INDIVIDUAL SHOOTS cause nobody wants to come with me T_T


hmmm.. i really have lots of work to do.. i really hope you would like the art that i would be uploading, though my style is really not evident, i mean i dont have a defined style yet, ahaha.. i treat each pic a different pic, though some might look alike, but really, they are different, ahaha! i would like to thank all those who support me especially ! i really appreciate it!


*slumberdoll and *blackmage9's image was stolen.. tsktsk.. help them out pls..

from the same set as

alone

hmmmm..

last weekend was tiring.. but it was an experience.. photo shoot at NLEX, yeah, our vehicle broke down, and we cant do anything but just grab our cameras and shoot.. ahaha..

miss pau's team building was great, and as usual, i was the photog and the bartender.. yay! but for me, the most important part of the team building was mamita reading my future using playing cards.. it was simply amazing, almost mind blowing how he knew almost everything..

here is the full details of my fortune..

i asked a question answerable by yes or no, my question was "does it make sense?" this would be answered in the end of the session.

well, first thing that he noticed that mostly what comes up is just "barkada". it seems to be the most significant factor in my life today..

then, he read that i just came from a heartbreak.. well, im not sure about the next one, that i have a friend (a guy) who knows every single detail of whats going on with my life now, maybe a gal friend would be more realistic, but actually, i have so many things happening to me, i dont think anyone cares enough to keep themselves updated to what is happening in my life today..

mamita also says, that i come on too strong.. and that i am generous, that i might give a little too much that i might regret it someday.. i dont believe in regretting things ive done.. especially moneywise, cause you can earn it later.. what is important is that you have shown that you care, but in this case, i havent really shown anything, ahahaha..

lastly, he said that i am planning to buy something expensive, and he is discouraging me.. cause i would be needing the money afterwards.. thats why my lens fund got hold..

and the answer to my question was, no, and there would be somebody who would leave me.. wooo, that is scary..

really bad fortune looms ahead of me.. oh well.. i would be on hiatus for maybe a week.. i would be going to HK with my family..

i would leave you with some of my favorites that would best describe how i feel right now..



Hope you're happy now

Caught you in the arms of another
I've been dying everyday since then

yeah.. problems.. why do we have so much of them? yeah.. i know that life is so short to be grieving over things.. in fact, just yesterday, im so happy, then, now, im sad again.. much like last week.. and the week before that.. my point is, i know i can be happy, i have seen me do it, experience it, but why do i tend to hug the sorrow even more.. dont i like being happy, being the carefree spirit that is shown in my outer shell called body.. yeah.. sometimes, self pity is just my favorite dish, maybe because i have a very low self esteem in some aspects.. yeah, sometimes, i feel i dont deserve to love.. ahaha.. a very sad thought.. thought if i would be accepting this reality, i would be free from most of my problems.. yeah.. i can still remember me saying that i have pretty much given up "love" yeah, it was just a few months ago right, i felt empty, so much different from the feeling of being strucked down, stabbed and crushed in a moment while flying, daydreaming and simply floating in another moment.. as always, if i am to chose between the feeling of emptiness o the unstable feeling of fascination and defeat, i would hands down choose the later, but the safer choice sometimes would be the better choice.. but i never wanted to be better, i always wanted to be the best..

UPDATE

i lost my phone, again.. tsk tsk.. but i already called globe so they would cut my line and re instate it after i get a new phone.. so im still keeping my number..

want a vector art or other traditional art? check [link]
she has good prices and her work is truly amazing! she made this, yay! go now, commission her!!!

well, before my cel got lost, i got a chance to talk to her! im happy.. ahaha.. making every little single sadness worth it.. moments like that are priceless.. its times like this that im happy that im loveless, cause i really appreciate every moment, none is taken for granted.. everything is felt upto the bottom of my heart.. im not sure if i would be happy later, what is important right now is that i was happy, even for a moment! plus thanks for all of you who cheered me up!


here are some of my favorite sad deviations..



here are some of my deviations that feature my sadness..



i dont deserve to be happy

*jumps around jumpscars*

hello hello,

my other journal is growing old.. (you might still think its *Crissey's bday)

gonna copy my 360 blog *LAZY*..

haha.. on the title.. Well.. Is it true? I dont think so.. I am even warned by my colleague about this.. So as always, im hesitant.. And like what i have said before, i think that love is over rated, and it dies out pretty much quicker than expected.. Haha.. Bitter.. But at least right now, im probably inspired.. And i dont find anything wrong about it..

yay for model shoots
here are my faves and new ones*w00t*


DA idols irl
more pics in my scrap [link] *camwhorez*


Colaborations
with ~Ethermoon note me if yu want to collaborate, i gots tons of model pics i havent edited yet


update
collaboration with =ladyfish found in her multiply site! [link]



acknowledgments!
people here in DA that inspires me/helps me too ..

oh, this is long.. oh yeah! plus the indonesian photographers too like ~dodoy ~arya-dwipangga *afvoetomath ~TOYIB ~dumped *LittleJean =marvelet and ~darkwingsuicide

ohh! lastly.. special thanks to
for always adding my art to your fave! ahaha! i lurve joo!

and to for featuring me! my first and only feature! ahaha!
ps. i have a club!

try this out.. this is cool! [link]

i wanna be a jumper